Credits: Social Media
People with social anxiety are more likely to feel ‘shame’ after bad dates,�study finds
More and more these days, people are meeting their romantic partners on dating apps like Tinder, Bumble, and Hinge. Sure, technology cuts out some of the tricky bits. But as with meeting people the old-fashioned way, online dating is easier for some than for others.
People with social anxiety disorder (SAD) not to be confused in this instance with seasonal affective disorder, which also goes by the acronym SAD are more likely to experience shame and embarrassment following negative dating experiences, compared with people without SAD, according to a recent study. Remedies depend on the person, but examples might include making a celebration of doing something alone or working breathing and bodywork exercises into your daily routine.
Symptoms of social anxiety disorder make bad dating experiences worse
According to a recent study published by the Journal of Anxiety Disorders, dating-related shame is most acutely felt by people with social anxiety disorder (SAD).
But it doesnt work the other way. Socially anxious people dont perceive positive dating experiences as more positive than people without SAD. In other words, they don’t get any compensation for having a disadvantage.
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To complete the study, researchers compared diary entries from participants aged 18 to 33, all of which used dating apps to organize romantic dates. Half had SAD; half didnt. Equal numbers were men and women.
Interestingly, people with and without SAD didnt differ from each other in the number of dates they went on, the frequency with which they used dating apps, or the amount of time they spent on them. But they did differ in how they felt about, and after, those dates.
Why SAD compounds negative dating experiences
Social anxiety disorder is very common. It affects as much as 14% of people during their lifetimes.
Its symptoms include:
- Intense fear of rejection, ridicule, and other negative reactions
- Substantial functional impairment
- Negatively impacted interpersonal relationships
Its also considered a risk factor for many other anxiety and mood disorders, and is associated with a reduced quality of life.
Individuals with SAD are characterized by unique emotional patterns, write the papers authors. They experience increased loneliness and envy, reduced feelings of pride compared to individuals without SAD, and more negative interpretive biases than individuals without the disorder.
In other words, people with SAD are more likely to perceive ambiguous social situations in a negative way, and to see slightly bad things as very bad.
People with social anxiety can also fear positive judgment
Not only do people with social anxiety disorder often fear negative evaluation by others, but they might also find themselves fearing positive evaluation. Why?
Because it could turn against them. In one study, responses to questions about fears of positive evaluation (FPE) reflected an underlying fear of negative evaluation.
The authors describe one emerging theme as concerns about others raising their expectations of the person in future situations, increased pressure to meet those expectations, and failing to do so.
All of this compounds in dating contexts, where there is already a disproportionate focus on things like pride, jealousy, self-esteem, and authenticity.
Everything is heightened, and for someone with social anxiety disorder, the extra height gets a boost, making it more likely theyll come away from a neutral or slightly negative social interaction thinking it went either slightly bad or terribly.
