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Letting your partner go through your phone is healthy for the relationship, argues counselor�
Snooping into your lover’s phone is an obvious red flag. A dating counselor argues that going through your partner’s phone with their consent isn’t necessarily bad.
Boundaries are important to foster a healthy relationship, and so is the willingness to be open about your insecurities, including what’s hiding in your partner’s phone.
Should you go through your partner’s phone?
Licensed relationship and dating counselor, Jordan Kennington, presents a situation before sharing her hot take on one of the most controversial topics.
If your partner is insecure or anxious for whatever reason – a bad breakup, cheated on by an ex-lover, etc., – and wants to check your phone to calm themself down, what would you ideally do?
While some may think it’s an invasion of privacy, Jordan says you should be more respectful of your partner’s request and try to understand where they are coming from.
The need to check your phone may have nothing to do with you and their behavior is mostly driven by their insecurities, she says.
Although it may seem shocking, you might as well let them go ahead if you have nothing to hide from your significant other.
She believes the partner who is hesitant to show their phone is either hiding something or treats the intrusive behavior as unacceptable.
However, the dating counselor says you should “give your partner the grace” instead as they are honest about their insecurities. They may also feel more secure after realizing you’re hiding nothing from them, which leads to “more trust” in the relationship.
‘Secure couples’ say yes
Jordan’s take on the topic is anything but conventional, but several “secure couples” have seconded her thoughts.
When one user wrote: “She has access to my phone with our code and her face. I have nothing to hide. And if she sees something she doesnt like. I ask why. I validate. And then explain and we move on.”
“I would have very specific boundaries about what you are looking for. anything else? can’t get mad,” said another.
Another user in agreement with the counselor’s opinion, said: “I have nothing to hide and if it will help their anxiety then it is a positive.”
