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Former Mafia boss says being the quietest person in the room is the best ‘people skill’
A former Mafia boss has shared one ‘people skill’ he used as a manipulation tactic that will give you an advantage in life.
Michael Franzese was a caporegime in the Italian-American Colombo crime family and is the son of former underboss Sonny Franzese.
Former Mafia boss taught vital ‘people skill’
Speaking on a new episode of Steven Bartlett’s Diary Of A CEO podcast, the 73-year-old explained that he was a racketeer, which means as well as being a gangster, he also earned money and did business negotiations.
“I was more of a racketeer, and as a result of that I was constantly in business disputes and sitting down with other guys and you have to learn how to negotiate,” he said.
The ex-Mafia boss explained that you really needed to know what you were doing before walking into those meetings and come in prepared because otherwise, the people would “chew you up” – and that’s where one useful “people skill” came in.
While working for the Mafia, Franzese learnt to always be the quietest person in the room and let everyone else talk around him. This gives you the upper hand as you know a lot about them, but they know nothing about you.
“You can learn so much from people just when they talk and you keep quiet,” he said. “Sometimes you can walk into a room and be the smartest person in the room and you don’t want anybody to know that. You want people to just talk.”
In that case, you give them an opening. “Throw them a bone” so that they keep on talking, all the while you keep quiet and learn their personality.
“There’s other times when you’re not the smartest person in the room and by keeping quiet, nobody knows that,” he continued. “It’s a tremendous technique and in that life it was extremely valuable for me. I was always the last guy to talk.”
Use this skill to your advantage at work
The art of keeping quiet can be extremely useful and give you the upper hand, especially in a career environment. While it may seem counterproductive, being the quietest person in the room can be very effective in work meetings.
Silence is “power” as it gives you the ability to listen effectively, Psychology Today explains. Truly listening to someone without just waiting for your turn to speak makes you the most informed person in the room and allows you to get to know others better.
Being quiet also gives you a “clear view into the hearts of others,” by creating an empty space that others will fill with information about themselves. Their personality quickly becomes apparent, while they won’t know much about you.
Ultimately, this gives you more wisdom and understanding of the situation at hand which will make you better at your job, potentially leading to more praise, raises and bonuses.
