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5 subtle signs of manipulation that are easily overlooked, therapist warns
Manipulation is a highly toxic behavior used to control a person or a situation that isn’t always easy to identify.
Unlike the more obvious red flags in a relationship such as disrespect, name-calling, and lack of boundaries, manipulative tactics can be subtle when the person practicing them is highly skilled.
5 subtle signs of manipulation
Although people with problematic personality types like narcissism, psychopathy, or sociopathy are infamous for being highly manipulative, normal humans are capable of using the tactic too.
It’s more common in a toxic relationship, when one partner tries to control the other, without outrightly expressing their ill intentions. These five signs can help you identify if you’re subject to it.
Guil tripping
This is a tell-tale sign of manipulation often overlooked by the target. A toxic person can guilt trip you into believing you’ve done something wrong or you haven’t “done enough”, although you aren’t at fault.
They also do this to force you into specific behaviors as licensed therapist Jeff explains in his video.
Know you’re being manipulated if your romantic partner says: “If you truly loved me, you would do this for me.”
Playing good cop, bad cop
The contradicting behavior of someone can cause a lot of confusion in the person being manipulated.
The toxic person can go from being extremely nice to extremely mean in a matter of hours, leaving you scratching your head as to what could have possibly gone wrong.
This causes the target to “rationalize” the true behavior of the toxic person, hoping they’ll return to being nice as they show two sides to their personality.
Creating dependence
While co-dependency isn’t necessarily bad, solely depending on someone emotionally, financially, or in any other form is detrimental to your mental health.
A manipulator ensures you’re dependent on them, which gives them more control and power over you.
This also makes your prospect of leaving “daunting and nearly impossible,” thus sucking you back into the toxic relationship.
Gaslighting
Gaslighting is another well-known manipulation tactic used to create self-doubt and confusion. The manipulator makes you question your reality and remembrance.
This often chips at the victim’s self-esteem because their judgment is strongly denied.
Isolation
The fifth tactic manipulators use to cut you off from family and friends ensures you’re isolated and there’s no support system to reach out to for help.
Jeffrey is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor providing therapy services in Florida. His social media channels focus on providing brief and concise content on mental health, substance use, and psychology-related topics.
- CONTROVERSIAL TAKE: Letting your partner go through your phone is healthy for the relationship
