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Barstool's Hank addresses Ria and Marty dating drama as rumours swirl

Bruno Cooke May 10, 2022
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The good people at Barstool have been giving listeners a peek into the private lives of three of their colleagues. Who are Hank, Ria and Marty, and what is it about their break-up/dating history that has got Barstool listeners all worked up?

Who are Barstool colleagues ‘Handsome’ Hank and Ria, and when did they break up?

Ria, aka Maria Ciuffo, is one of the Chicks In The Office at Barstool. She runs the Chicks podcast with Fran (Francesca Mariano).

They bill themselves as “experts in all things pop culture”. They apparently count Justin Bieber among their followers; Kris Jenner has blocked them.

Meanwhile, “Handsome” Hank Lockwood produces Pardon My Take, and one or two other Barstool Sports shows. He’s “leading the war on viral tweets”, per his company bio

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Plenty of people have weighed in on this particular episode of Barstool Yak drama.

According to various accounts, Ria and Hank dated – and broke up some time ago. She and Fran put out a Chicks In The Office episode entitled Ria & Hank Broke Up on 21 June, so it was likely around that time.

Marty and Ria are now dating, despite Ria and Hank apparently saying they wouldn’t date co-workers. Marty and Ria work together, which means their relationship contravenes Ria and Hank’s alleged pact. As a result, people have been disavowing Marty left, right and centre.

Others, however, urge neutrality.

Why is fellow Barstool host Big Cat so upset with Marty for dating Ria?

Big Cat hosts Pardon My Take, Yak and The Rundown. He’s a “football guy’s guy”, according to his bio on the Barstool Sports website.

He gave his “full take” on the Hank/Ria/Marty situation yesterday (9 May 2022) during an episode of The Yak (see below).

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In a nutshell, his position is that he doesn’t “f*** with Marty any more”. 

“I do think they’ve been dating for longer than they are letting on,” he said. “People are still gonna be friends with Marty and Ria, and that’s… I have no problem with that. … I simply do not f*** with Marty.”

He also wanted to make sure people understood Hank did not ask him to enter the discussion. He did so of his own volition.

“I defend my guy Hank because I’ve been with him forever and he is one of my closest friends, people, in my life.”

The whole Hank/Ria/Marty Barstool Sports debacle is now all over Twitter

Ria tweeted yesterday that she doesn’t regret any decision. She apparently spoke to Hank and Hank says he doesn’t have a problem with Marty – only with her.

The whole scene has divided Barstool fans into camps, although the supporters with the loudest voices seem to be in Team Hank. Among them, apparently, is Tom Brady:

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Brady’s backing has made “everything worth it” for Hank Lockwood. All the bad feelings have “gone away”. 

“Take it easy on Ria and (Marty) Mush”, he tweeted yesterday. “Live happily ever after. I have the GREATEST QB TO EVER WALK THE PLANET in my corner and that’s enough for me.”

He has since encouraged people to back off Ria. Marty, meanwhile, appears to have conceded. He retweeted Tom Brady’s “Cosign” tweet with the hashtag, #RipMe.

Yesterday, Hank responded to Marty’s description of the events – and his and Ria’s relationship – via Twitter. Read it below:

Such is the social media frenzy around the Hank/Ria/Marty situation and the declarations of allegiance and loyalty that surround it, some have speculated it is all part of a ploy to “drum up views”.

There are others, too, who seem to think this is all part of a script:

What do you think about the whole situation?

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Bruno is a novelist, amateur screenwriter and journalist with interests in digital media, storytelling, film and politics. He’s lived in France, China, Sri Lanka and the Philippines, but returned to the UK for a degree (and because of the pandemic) in 2020. His articles have appeared in Groundviews, Forge Press and The Friday Poem, and most are readable on Medium or onurbicycle.com.